DAY 15 I am a BUTTERFLY!!!!

This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24
Day 15
I promised my self I wouldnt miss a day, excuse. 3 days at an art retreat and I was exhausted! Excuse over!
Driving home at midnight I was thinking out loud or talking to myself what I was going to blog about. I know , CRAZY right? Me a plan!?! I was so bummed that i c.didn't have the energy to do it, so heres waht I was thinki ng.
I learned so much about myself at this art convention, more than I thought.I took alot of notes, wrote a lot of words, just words that popped in my head and stuff.
When I was a littel girl i had ideas, alot. all the time. But they were always hidden in my head, when I did try to bring them out, I was told no.I was stupid, be realistic and so on. I;m sure alot of you can relate. So afraid of more rejection i kept putting them in littel boxes in my head,then to paper and wrote and drew as a child.
Long story short as an adult these ideas and creative impulses came back and I embraced it! I found myself!
I loved everybit of it! then I was married and he HATED i was an artist and just like a child I started to withdraw and stop what I loved and decided not to even put these ideas in a littel box in my head, what for, they were pointless, and it felt like another loss.
Then slowly after the divorce the boxes started to open like littel presents long forgotten in a closet. And when they did they started falling out faster than i could unwrap them!
Funny how at the same time I was (and still am) in a reltionship with someone who is intrigued and supports my art, even when he dosent understand it, he loves it because he loves me!

So I realize Im a buttterfly. I always have been. Abig bright yellow, pink and purple butterfly. But I didnt know. I still thought 'i was a catapillar. I was afraid of what the world and everyone around me wolud think when they saw me open my wings, and what if they wouldnt fly, what if no one liked the bright loud colors of my wings, but really what if they saw the littel rips in my wings, and knew, what if they really knew i was afraid to fly. so I would test it out when no one was aware, and when I did I was the happiest.always still sad inside because i really wanted to be the butterfly but felt oddly comfortable as the catapillar.
But now I know I AM A BUTTERFLY!!!!!!! I was mesant to fly!!!!! AND fly I will!
Today  I  am thankful not just for my shimmer wings but thankful they have the littel rips and holes in them ,its simply  just part of my journey and I am not ashamed! I AM A BUTTERFLY!
Thank you God for creativity and art and thank you for starting me out as a catapillar and taking the time to transform me and color my wings exactly like you wanted!